Last week I was watching my regular reality TV show when I started feeling a change in my mood. I was beginning to relate one of the characters on TV with my late wife. Then out of nowhere a flood of emotions, mostly sadness and anger, ensued. This is not the first time that I […]
A widower and single dad with huge appetite for food, travel and movies. A book-o-phobic and founder of "The Phoenix Family" community.
“Oh crap! I should not have done this to him”. “May be this would not have happened had I not been a single parent”. “He does not have anyone other than me”. Invariably all parents go through the “Oh my God! Am I a bad parent?” feeling. And single parenting sometimes has the effect of […]
“Daddy, why did you bring me birthday cake that looks like a game of scrabble? You should have made it a cake that looked like Scotland Yard instead”. Now that was one of the more recent complaints I got to hear from my son who is spoiled for choice. Nevertheless, that pushes me to invent […]
‘Do not go soft on your son thinking he has only you’, advised my son’s pediatrician after I got into my single parenthood. You will have to be strict with him whenever required. This was very hard for me to digest initially, how can I set rules or raise my voice on a 6 year […]
Some of the best advice I received during my initial days of second bachelorhood is take a break, go out and be with friends. I tried it. But the friend circle I had was limited. The friends with whom I did not have much touch with during married days, I did not get the same […]
I’d say most of us are a part of this rat race, watching our peers grow. Why do I feel so? I was, or rather I am party to this rat race. The cost of living is high, my peers buy houses, inflation… run the race, earn more… push working hours, impress boss, get a […]
“Daddy, I do not want to talk about it”, was my then 6 year old’s response when I asked him if he missed his mother. I was worried he was suppressing his grief and needed to be more expressive. It all started when his class teacher noticed he was making more than usual drawings in […]
Year 2013- My son was 6 years old and was attending school. I was with the doctor. The doctor held my hand and said it was over. Your wife is no more, please start informing your family – was his message. The first thing which struck me was how was I going to disclose this […]
Most of us who become bachelor(ette) the second time around, are often told that it is going to be okay. ‘Time will heal the loss/separation’,’just get busy’, ‘divert your attention’….. I feel otherwise. The more you ignore the fact that you are angry or sad about this phase of your life, the more it is going to have a […]
After the sudden loss of my wife, I was confused with several questions running inside my head. Not knowing what’s next. Looking for answers, I made a friend who happened to be a widow. We were able to relate to each other’s problem easily. The non-judgmental advice and empathy we had for each other, helped […]
I'm a new member. And while I have barely been part of this group for a couple of weeks, I already feel so warmly included. And even though I have not as yet shared any of my story with the group, there has been no pressure to do so. It's comforting for a change to know that others are going through what I have and am going through. More importantly, through the various conversations and especially these testimonials I realise that I'm not the only one getting through each day trying to be strong and keep it all together. Something many others won't understand. And the amazing thing is there is so much support to help you get through each day. This group to me seems to be one where strangers come together to become more than just friends.....a family by choice.
When I was hunting for a safe, credible, sensible and useful group for single moms, I came to know about the Phoenix community. Initially, I was skeptical cos it was run by a single dad. However, I gave it a shot and since then, there has been no moment where I regretted for it. It's a family of strong people, who are different from the lot and have beautiful perspective towards things in life. In this group, I feel at home and feel good to celebrate the good days, vent out on the frustrating days, cry on the depressed days and yet I know they would never look down upon me. The wavelength and the bonding is so strong that you can never fall apart or go wrong even if you wish to.
Hats off to the man who is keeping the group intact with his light headedness ( I didn't mean it literally), wisdom, practical solutions and for giving a different angle to all kind of problems faced by the fellow members of the family. It takes enormous commitment and he is fantastic!!!
Looking forward to a great family/community for the single parents who can be rest assured that they will never be mistaken or judged, whatever profession they may be!!! I am myself, when am in the family....thanks to all the beautiful people out here....