Its 5am and I don’t need to wake-up because I haven’t slept. Another sleepless night, getting out of bed is the most difficult part of the day. I don’t sleep but I want to stay in bed. Just crawl under the covers and disappear. The tears well up. Let me be! But I have no choice. Do […]
“Oh crap! I should not have done this to him”. “May be this would not have happened had I not been a single parent”. “He does not have anyone other than me”. Invariably all parents go through the “Oh my God! Am I a bad parent?” feeling. And single parenting sometimes has the effect of […]
One year ago, I had the chance of interacting with a family that had recently moved into the neighbourhood. They had a unique way of dealing with their kids’ mistakes; I call it unique because I had not seen other parents use this approach till then. When a mistake occurred, they analyzed the reason behind […]
“Daddy, why did you bring me birthday cake that looks like a game of scrabble? You should have made it a cake that looked like Scotland Yard instead”. Now that was one of the more recent complaints I got to hear from my son who is spoiled for choice. Nevertheless, that pushes me to invent […]
‘Do not go soft on your son thinking he has only you’, advised my son’s pediatrician after I got into my single parenthood. You will have to be strict with him whenever required. This was very hard for me to digest initially, how can I set rules or raise my voice on a 6 year […]
“Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom”, came running my son, screaming with excitement. He dropped his tuition bag on to the sofa and frantically searched for something amidst his toys. “What? What are you searching for?” I asked showcasing mild excitement. “I need my shovel” he said “Why? What is it for?” I asked “I am going […]
I’d say most of us are a part of this rat race, watching our peers grow. Why do I feel so? I was, or rather I am party to this rat race. The cost of living is high, my peers buy houses, inflation… run the race, earn more… push working hours, impress boss, get a […]
As a working mum, I often felt guilt about not being there for my child. Was I missing out on the best years? Would the bond we shared be strong enough to get us through the teenage years? Would we be able to be friends when she was all grown up in her twenties? Would […]
“Daddy, I do not want to talk about it”, was my then 6 year old’s response when I asked him if he missed his mother. I was worried he was suppressing his grief and needed to be more expressive. It all started when his class teacher noticed he was making more than usual drawings in […]
“I am a single parent. What is your super power?” I smiled at the whatsApp post. Tearing my eyes away from the mobile screen, I saw my stubborn offspring staring at me, reinforcing what I just read. Had I read this post a year ago, I swear I would have been laughing at it, but […]
I'm a new member. And while I have barely been part of this group for a couple of weeks, I already feel so warmly included. And even though I have not as yet shared any of my story with the group, there has been no pressure to do so. It's comforting for a change to know that others are going through what I have and am going through. More importantly, through the various conversations and especially these testimonials I realise that I'm not the only one getting through each day trying to be strong and keep it all together. Something many others won't understand. And the amazing thing is there is so much support to help you get through each day. This group to me seems to be one where strangers come together to become more than just friends.....a family by choice.
I consider myself fortunate to have met a group like the phoenix family, especially during the most depressing and nerve-wracking phase of my life. They have listened to my rants, my sorrows, hopes and fears. Providing sound advice, helping and encouraging me at every step of this journey as a single parent. A warm and heartfelt shout out to the group admin and founder of the phoenix family, he's truly the soul of the group and the glue that holds all of us together. They're not just a group of friends anymore, they are family. Words cannot express how immensely grateful my daughter and I are to all of you. Much love.
The IllusionistSeparated, Mom of 3 year old